I am okay...I am me!

Sorry, it’s been a little while since I’ve sat down to write. Lots of things have happened. I’m having surgery, a double mastectomy with immediate reconstruction, on January 18th. It’s the best choice for me for sure. I’m at total peace with it. I choose to focus on what is right in my life. I am so grateful for all the wonderful and enlightened friends I have and especially my wonderful husband and family. However, I do have some family that feels like I am pretending to be okay with everything for their benefit. I really am okay with everything. I am moving forward, I do NOT feel bad for myself, or bitter, or paralyzed that this has happened to me. It all comes down to that one favorite quote of mine by Dr. Wayne Dyer, “With all that has happened to you, you can either feel sorry for yourself or treat what has happened as a gift. Everything is either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You get to choose.” One thing I have learned in life is you ALWAYS have a choice. You don’t always have a choice in what happens, but you have a choice in how you react, think and feel about it. I’m not trying to minimize the situation and I know that everyone deals with it in their own way, but this is happening to me and I know how I feel. No, it hasn’t all been easy, but you find your way through it all and then you land in this place where you just know it is all okay. I suppose it depends on where you are on your journey in life as to how quickly you move through a situation or hang on to it and feel bad about it. I’ve learned to let go and not be attached to “things”. “If I am what I have then when I don’t have it, then I’m not.” NOT! That is SOOOOO far from the truth. I’m not a new house or car, or a degree or a job, or how much money I have in the bank, or my boobs…or even my body. I’m something else beyond this and whatever you take away from me, there is still this “me” inside that nobody can take away, unless I let them.